Conversation btn amos n limei
limei: 你知道nick发生什么事吗？
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limei:你是他的cousin mah...
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amos: 我有跟他讲过，可是他也是不听。(我这个cousin)就和其他的friend一样...
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amos: 他很像不想join shomerim...
limei: teens到个阶段，会觉得peers都不了解自己。
amos: 对。我也有过。有时到了个阶段可能会觉得外面的朋友比较了解自己。then 就drift away lor, or make new friends... 而且这种事是要靠自己走出来的。别人是帮不了的。有时朋友不了解是自己不肯说...
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他们在说的时候我静静的听着。想着自己的处境，似乎雷同。backtracked to last year, since the bedsheet incident with gene, i haven't been out with them. felt that i wasn't understood there anymore, or wrose still, i was never understood, and i cannot be tolerated there anymore. delusion with myself. "quote quote...到了个阶段可能会觉得外面的朋友比较了解自己".. and yes.. i drift away... did i return? i dun know.. this raise 2 impt dangerous questions..
if i really drift away from them, most likely it is becos 我自己看不开。so? what remedy should i apply?
well.. if it's God's will for me to make new friends, that will be good. but if i am just being an excapist, to seek refuge in a midst of new friends.. that's dangerous.. i am, where my heart lies is a big problem.
argh.. to dangerous to think further.. and too, difficult for me..
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